Little Girl In A Reverie
 

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Wednesday, April 27, 2005
Quite The Businessman

Apparently it's time for the SAM Charity Drive again. Last year Krystle, Jocelyn and their classmates invited me to help them with Nail Arts! I remember feeling so touched.

This year, there are so many "fun filled activities". We have the obligatory dunking machine, which I thought resembled a human catapult machine(though I truly know that if one was to sit on it and be catapulted, one would land on the grounds of Sri Kuala Lumpur school or even SJMC, for convenience's sake.) when I saw them putting the woods together to make the dunking machine. Oh, and there's Dodgeball too! Everybody, go support Joe Hock's class! At DR2! Apparently the game is the exact replica of the movie's version.

During my lunch hour, a few of my classmates and I were as usual standing around the guard house debating on where to eat. There was a table next to the guard house selling muffins, tarts and other delicacies. Everything about it was so prim and proper and OH yes, delicious too.

Save for the guy who was manning the booth.

"CAAAAAAAAAARRRMMMMMMMMM... BAAAAAAAAAIiIIIIIIiEeeeEeee.. BAiIIIiIiiiIIEeeEe FrOomMmMMMMMM G(some sam class)!!!!!!! FRESHhHhhhhHIIiiIIIIIiIIIIIieieiee!!!!!!!!"

If you found that too difficult to read, he screamed, "Come! Buy! Buy from G(some sam class)! Fresh!" He was just standing there screaming at no one in particular. Just doing his bit in advertising his class' muffins, I suppose.

Now, he looks like your average Taylor's kid. Even though we commented on his jacket in the sweltering weather, we too wear jackets alot in class but obviously NOT under the hot sun. Nevermind, it's mild eccentricity. We can tolerate that.

But screaming, we cannot.

Barry and I were trying to have a decent conversation about She Dee being in the hospital for having a low platlet count(yes, hope she gets better.) and the guy was screaming away. We were standing about 2 metres away from him, most.

"Yeah.. She Dee got admitted. Poor thing," I said, trying to beat the guy's voice.

"MUFFFINNNNNSSSS..SO FRESSSSHHHHHHHHHIIEEE..COME COME BUY BUYYyyyyyyyYY~~~!!!!!!!"

"Oh, really..! What's wrong?" Barry showed his concern, but frowning at the mad sam guy.

"OIIIIIIII..BUYYYYYYYYYY LLAAAAAAAAA..... SO FRESSHHHH..BUYYYYYYYY..!!"

"The doctor suspects she has Dengue or something.. low platlet count ma.." I replied.

"G(some sam class) SELLLLIINNNNGG MUFFINSSSS... DELICIIIIOOUUSSSS MARRRRFFFFFIIIIIIINNSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!"

"Oh right.. erm..hope she get's........JEEEEZUS CHRISSST SHUT THE FUCK UP LA!!!!!!!" Barry screamed back at (poor)mad sam guy. You need to sputter saliva to get that effect.

We were only 2 metres away from the booth. Just 2!

But oh well, mad sam guy's must've been too busy screaming because he didn't start throwing tarts at Barry. Ahahahahahaha. I was too embarassed to see mad sam guy's expression so I walked off laughing. Met Su-Hsien and her classmates outside college. Apparently Tanya also said something aloud that was meant to be directed to the poor mad sam guy.

Barry and Tanya were not the only ones; there was this bunch of guys who were saying, "Oei, pasar ke?!"

I mean shouting and all is appropriate. But not continuous shouting screaming.

Over lunch, I told Barry that the guy could've lost his temper and threw a few muffins at him. Barry said he'd be happy because he would catch them and then eat them.

We laughed.

He added that he should probably take one of the tarts and throw at the guy, and then, oh, hand him RM1.80 after that.

LOL.

Perhaps THIS is the mad sam guy's trick. Scream like mad and get people annoyed at him AND THEN get another mad guy like Barry Ooi to throw an egg tart in his face, hence getting the crowd's interest and everyone would like a go too. Very clever! Imagine the amount they would make!

Maybe the poor mad sam guy was just abit nervous about having to man the store alone. I don't mean to be mean to him, but he was pretty funny, screaming under the hot sun and all.

After class, I came down wondering if mad Sam guy was still there. I couldn't stop smiling when I noticed that he was so much more subdued and he looked very tired. All that shouting and screaming would have tire anyone.

Thanks for the entertainment though, mad sam guy. :) I'll buy a blueberry muffin from you tomorrow. It's the least I could do since I used you in my entry without your permission. Please don't scream at me though. *closes ears*

Jayelle's back and neck ached at 11:15:58 pm
   (3) glitter balls rolling.  | 

Tuesday, April 26, 2005
I Remember The Pain

As I was happily watching Net Deception on WLT and popping cadbury chocolate, oohing and aahing at the yau yeng-ness of Wong Hei, my brother came home and said, "I didn't get nominated for (Leo)Presidency,".

He had on his Devastated FaceTM. I didn't know what to say.. but I could only offer my genuine surprise when he told me who else got nominated. Even though I don't know the other nominees, but I thought he'd at least make it into the nominees.

"This is really the biggest let down of my life," he muttered and proceeded to have his lunch.

I turned back to the tv but an old memory was playing in my head, like an old tape I've just found in the depths of a cupboard.

At that time, I thought that it was THE moment. After waiting for nearly three years to be in the oh-so-glamorous board of directors of the Interact Club, it was finally judgement day. I remember having my heart set on the president elect post. I remember thinking, "Ah, since I mix more with the members because of my past positions in the projects, perhaps there'd be more votes for me."

Yes, I was so shallow. I'm sorry, Melody.

I sat next to my best friend Melody, both of us gripping our chairs. Because we always knew it was either one of us and even though we've always said, "It's ok, no matter who gets it, it's ok," but deep down, we know it's THE position.

I think it was Pooi Yoke who was scribbling the names down. She scribbled, "President Elect," on the blackboard. Her script was forceful and determining. Melody's name appeared first. I was just lightly tapping on the side of the chair, "Ok, I'm next..la di da..".. and then I saw her write Amni's name.

And she stopped there.

I remember hearing a chorus of disbelieves rippling around the friends who were sitting near me. Someone nominated me and my name was added as the third name. I felt it was very spontaneous. That saddened me.

All the members were given papers to scribble their votes and I voted for Melody before standing up and leaving the chair to go out of the room as the votes need to be counted.

Behind the block, I remember me, Melody and Amni were modestly telling each other, "Ah, I'm sure you'll get it lah.." "Nolah..... we'll see lah." "Aiyah, it doesn't matter who gets it."

One of the seniors ushered us back in to the room. Joshua, the president then, presented with a fluorish, "The President Elect for 2001/2002....Melody Song!!" Applause erupted throughout the members of the floor.

What a hypocrite I was. I clapped my way back to my seat, which was nearly two/three classrooms away. I sat on my seat.

I felt numb. Yoke Mei(the then Club Treasurer) proceeded to pass the next empty slip of paper for the next position. She bent down and looked me in the eye and asked, "Jolene.....you ok or not?"

Tears cascaded down like waterfalls and within seconds I was a blubbering mess. I had to be ushered out of the room and Dennis was there to comfort me. Since I entered the school he's always been the one giving me wise-old-man type of advice. He was saying words that made alot of sense, but I was too engrossed with my own dissapointment to understand where he was coming from.

At that time it really felt so disappointing.

Mel knew she couldn't talk to me at the moment. It was all too raw. Apparently I lost to her by 3 votes.

A few friends followed me home.. strangely I can't remember exactly who, but I remember Aloysious Choong was one of them. I remember telling him things like I wanted two things: One was being class monitor and the other was being the president elect.

Power hungry, weren't we?

That day was my brother's 12th birthday and all the way to the hotel that we were staying at, I lay across the backseat, staring out at the clouds and crying silent tears. Because I know my father will scold me for crying over such "petty matters".

It was one of those moments that whenever you think about it, tears will flow again.

It took me until the following week before I knew I became an assistant director to get over my so called failure. Even when I became the club secretary and missed out on the vice president AND president post again, I couldn't give shit. Because it was my dearest friends who were leading the club with me. Nothing could've been better.


Years later, I realized what alot of people said was true. These Leo clubs and Interact Clubs, we are sometimes too consumed by its popularity. There was always a constant battle as to which club has more members. During my time, the Interact Club had 600 members and the Leos had about 250 odd members which is still a very good number compared to many many other schools. Perhaps the super seniors were way more matured about it. But I remember we used to taunt each other about the "coolness" of our clubs. Mind you, this all happened in early secondary.

Honestly, I can admit to you. I enjoyed having juniors knowing my name when I didn't even know theirs.(I was never mean to them for the record). I know my friends too enjoy being in these so called elite clubs.

Though we deny and say, "Service above Self!" or "We Serve!". But blah, blah, deep down we never really looked beyond those mottos. It was just words that we memorised to show that we are part of these societies.

The chase for the highest positions in these clubs still lingers on in my memory. Friendships are seriously tested when we work together on projects.

Greed gets us no where as well. I remember a friend who was in the Leo club turned down a post because it was just too small. Expecting something bigger like Vice President 1 or even Vice President 2. In the end, this friend of mine didn't even get nominated for anyything else. Imagine the disappointment when the rest of the gang got it and this friend didn't. That night, they all went out to celebrate and being part of the gang, this friend obviously tagged along. It's quite sad you know?

One thing's for sure: Not getting something that seems so significant to you at that moment will soon pale in comparison as the years go by.

Mervyn, I understand you worked very hard for the club and not getting what you want from the club makes it seem like the largest dissapointment ever. I'm not gonna lecture you about how it's really all charity work, because, bah, how many of us actually really thought about the poor children and stray animals that we work our asses off to support? We just work for the sake of hanging out with our friends. But when the word, "Elections" comes to mind, honestly, does "charity" follows suit? That's why. So I'm not going to tell you how it's really all about charity.

Because it's not. If you are all about hanging out with your friends from the club, then at the end of the day, no matter how much it hurts, being with your friends(indirectly for a common purpose) beats having the fame of a president which comes together with so many unwanted responsibilities. *remembers when Chee Kiang was Leo president and faced hardships back in form4* Definitely not as fun as you think it would be.

Jayelle's back and neck ached at 4:50:54 pm
   (16) glitter balls rolling.  | 

Monday, April 25, 2005
Just One Year Overseas

I'm currently sitting on the floor of my bedroom and at 10 minutes to 3am, my notes which I intend to sort out into subject piles are still strewn all over the floor. My legs are on either sides of the laptop's screen and if I'd want to do trajectory pee I can short-circuit my keyboard. You get the picture. I completed a maths paper and my holiday biology essays though. So I shall tell myself: Somewhat guilt free.

I thought I'd like to share with you another meaningful conversation I had with my dad this afternoon.

Dad was telling the both of us(Mervyn and I) that we must(<--read) at least persue one year of education overseas. The way he said it somehow made it seem like he thinks it would be the best experience we can have before we infiltrate the working world.

I've always thought that my dad had applauded my choice to do everything local. I suppose with medicine in mind back then, local education sounded most appealing as compared to the half a million bucks needed for countries like Aussie. More than a million bucks is needed for the UK. *puts on sluttiest clothes to help the family's finances*

I think most of you know that my Dad really wanted me to be the first Lai doctor in the family. Realism has caught up with the both of us though; a doctor's life will never cut it for me. I cannot imagine spending so many hours away from home. Besides, if I become a doctor it'll be such a straight road. What will become of my cosmetic brand?? 

So yes, the current mindset is still on the medical bioscience track. Or is it bio medical science? A double degree in the aforementioned degree and a bio tech degree is very time consuming but at least I can have my one year overseas with that.

The question is: Am I fit to take on TWO degrees? Someone told me that I will never see my house ever again with the amount of hours I'll have to spend away from home.

Yes I know there are many other universities out there. But how many have campuses in Malaysia? *sigh* The other universities in Malaysia just don't seem as appealing. My other choice would be to look beyond Malaysia. 3/4/5+0. NOOOOooooo..*holds Mummy's hand tightly*

Months back when I made the decision that I'd eventually do everything local, I heaved a sad sigh.

What fun things can I tell my kids when they are old enough to appreciate campus life?

A 40-something Jolene will mumble, "erm, well, clubbing, nah. Your popo and kongkong don't let. I ..erm..blogged..alot..".. to which my hip and happening teenage daughter will start to refer me as that Old Lady Who Was Unhappening Then and Now.

But now it's different. Dad seems like he is insisting that I find a way to do one year of education overseas. Suddenly, money doesn't seem THAT big an issue. (He usually stresses on this point. ALOT. Sarcastically.) I feel..strangely touched that he is allowing me a year overseas. I wonder if he is prepared to break the RM100k limit? Education plus cost of living will surely be more than that.

Oh yeah, he also said that we'll have to give him Rm1000 each when we start working. Okay, I'll just have to ask him to buy me a nice cardboard box to live in when I start working if that is the case. I'd like those from Ikea, please.

Imagine the life I'll have to train myself to lead! The amount of cooking I can impress myself and anybody else who is interested with. The somewhat culture shock which will leave me slightly lost in translation but readily accomodating. The different people I will meet. What an experience!

I just don't want to be regretful of my choices when I am old and grey. I don't want to turn bitter about not having the experience. At least by doing a 2+1, I'll have the best of both worlds.

Just one year. One year is enough for me to miss home. One year is not long enough for everyone to forget the existence of a mad woman named Jolene Lai.

Jayelle's back and neck ached at 4:43:15 am
   (20) glitter balls rolling.  | 

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Hi, my name is Jolene and if there is a question in your head, this answer will definitely answer it: I was wrong and irrational. I was being a woman.

Jolene Lai, Jolene Lai,
Came to life in January and not July,
She is 19 years of age,
Can't wait to earn her own wage,
This dental student is home sick,
Will never be in Kedah for more than three weeks.

Subang Jaya is where she's from,
The only place she'll ever call home.
Has a boyfriend, a brother and a dog,
The things she says can give you a shock.

Especially for her father, who always gets a heart attack when he reads this blog.

Hey, rhymes!
 
Why The National Service Entries Ended.

My favourite posts:
Please Don't Take My Orange Away (9/03/05)
Flasher On MSN! (28/4/05)
Looking Back From Where They Left Off (8/10/05)
A Bottle Of My Bestest Friends In The Whole Wide World!(13/2/06)
Diary Extracts For Him From The Yesteryears (23/3/06)



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