I suspect I'll get an awful hearing from a few of you (especially adults) for not enjoying my youth. How working life will be the pits. How I will hate my 9-5 job. Yeah, so I'll blog about how depressing it is when I work 9-5. As of now, let me blog about how depressing it all is when I'm a (always on the verge of being)penniless student cramming for her big major exam.

Everyday I see the same people. Same faces. We talk about the same things. I look in the mirror, I see the same face, the same hair. I feel like screaming. I look around my room I see the same mess. I move around my small sub-urb and see the same traffic situations. My stupid Windows Media Player plays the same songs over and over again. I read the same websites over and over again. The crick in my back hurts everyday, at the same spot. I eat the same food. I see the same shows.  I do the same things. Is this all there is to it?

I wonder how my mum finds excitement in housework day in,day out. How my maths teacher can bring herself to class everyday to teach us the same equations she thought for the past 9 years. Oh my god. Maybe she has that something called moolah as a motivation. Hm. Yes. I don't. It's just given to me as allowance. There's no excitement in it because I didn't work for it.

No motivation = Boredom = Rut

Bring on graduation! Bring on the first salary! Bring on adulthood! Bring on the live in boyfriend! Bring on The First Time! Bring on marriage! Bring on the grandchildren!

There comes a point in everyone's life where nothing really seems interesting. This is my definition of a rut. *groan*

Maybe it's because I never go out anywhere anymore. Since a few of us left Malaysia, we seem to find no reason in holding outings anymore. It's the damn exams.

Before anyone tells me I'm an ungrateful bitch for the way I am ranting, please have a look at your calendar and match it with the dates from previous months in my entries archives. It's that time of the month again. Shitfuck.